2013년 6월 2일 일요일

Monthly TOEFL Essay #2 (Possible changes in 21st century)


Topic for the response: The 21st century has begun. What changes do you think this new century will bring? Use examples and details in your answer.


On December 31st, 1999, at the last day of 20th century, hope and expectation were prevalent in society with fear and worries facing the new millennium. Embracing those emotions, it has been 13 years since 21st century was born. Several changes are made until now, and they are indicating other new changes in the future as well. I’ve selected few changes which are expected to be brought by brand new century.


Netscape went public on September 8th, 1995 at the cost of 28$. It started the internet, dotcom market boom. In 21st century, with the invention of smart phone, the world consists of more webs of internet and cell phones, and the development of network shifted the agent of several activities from group to individuals. Now we can download open-source software, movies, and songs with one click at home. For example, using a program ‘utorrent’, each individuals can upload and download files. We can update our status on our personal blogs or social media. Free educational lectures are offered at university website, making our visit to school unnecessary. In the past, all sort of things used to be held in groups such as the education in classroom, information shared in library. However, due to the development of network in 21st century, activities are becoming individual-oriented.


Expected changes also include the development of renewable energy. The renewable energy is an energy which comes from the resources which are continuously replenished. They include wind, solar, bio-fuel and geothermal energy. Their further developments in 21st century are self-evident since the men are feeling the need of renewable energy by their skin. The global warming is expedited in 21st century, causing several phenomena such as stronger hurricanes, sea level rising, and polarization of seasons. Oil, natural gas and coal are running out within a century at most, and pollution is getting worse in every aspect. People started to focus on renewable energy, and continuing research and development. For example, methane hydrate and shale gas are newly found energy which are being investigated currently. Since human are keep feeling the need of renewable energy, and conducting research and development, renewable energy are expected to be the main source of energy.


Barely a decade has passed since 21st century began, and it might be too early to suggest changes expected in new century. However, individualization and renewable energy as main energy source are quite feasible changes. By reflecting 20th century, I hope we earn more positive changes than negative ones, and better result at the end of 21st century.

댓글 3개:

  1. Seems like I'm the first uploader!
    This essay is basically well-organized, considering that the points you've made are rephrased at the conclusion part. It might've been better if you implicitly described it at the intro, but still, you gave a grasp of your essay in overall. Plus, that you are referring to interesting examples (like Netscape), and getting to your argument chronologically, I wasn't bored at all.
    To sum up, it was a good essay! I appreciate your effort into it.
    d

    답글삭제
  2. Hi YeSeul!!!!
    I'd say that your essay is well-written and very informative!! I'm very impressed :) Especially, specific examples helped me understanding your essay.
    But I want to ask you why you chose to write about the development of network. I admit that it's one of the changes that will take place in the new century, but I don't see a clear reason of choosing this topic. Activities becoming individual-oriented might need a stronger support. It's just a suggestion and I really enjoyed reading your essay!

    답글삭제
  3. Hey ye seul~~ :D
    First of all, good style, few grammatical errors, and casual ending-which I liked the most. And I feel like you have elaborated your each point well with specific examples. Good! Especially, your point about social networking was good. Introducing new concepts were quite impressive as well. Overall, one of the best essays I have read so far! gooood :D

    답글삭제